So many women say, "When I was a little girl I dreamed..." You can use your imagination here and fill in the blank with whatever magical life altering moment you want to drum up. As much as I want to say this was and has been the story of my life, I can't! I honestly have no clue what I dreamed about when I was a little girl, but I'm pretty darn sure it wasn't anything pertaining to marriage, children, homes, jobs, or any other "grown-up" nonsense. I was a kid, I did kid things & thought kid things. And, to be quite honest, as much as I make it appear I have everything planned out perfectly, I actually don't!
The one place in my life that my Type A controlling personality doesn't take over is planning what the future holds. Sure I have dreams, goals, and desires. Yes...I believe in reaching for the stars. But, as hard as I work at achieving those ideals, I just go with the flow, see what life brings me, and walk this path of life doing things MY WAY. My path hasn't always been easy, there have been bumps and turns along the way and perhaps a few U-turns! But, isn't the truth that the things we work the hardest for in our lives the ones we actually truly value the most?
My husband, my best friend, my rock! It amazes me that after being together half our lives, we are able to keep that special spark ignited. No one seems to understand and put up the madness of me quite like Ryan does, and for that I'm thankful. He's the calm to my storm, the patience I swear I have but don't really, the reason behind the chaos I create, the teacher I need, and the unconditional love I am grateful for. He has taught me to go with it as much as I fight it, and to sit back and relax in order to enjoy the little things in life. He's given me six amazing years of marriage, 2 almost 3 beautiful children, and a promised future full of love as we grow old together.
My first-born, my GEM, my Big Sister! Giulietta made me a Momma, taught me how the love a Momma has for her child happens before birth, and has given me 4 years full of firsts. My sweet girl is a serious thinker who can be found contemplating much of what life has to offer, she follows instead of leads which quite frankly scares me because its so not my personality, and she is the BEST big sister anyone could ask for. She surprises me with her intelligence and ability to soak up the world around her almost daily, and she makes me yearn to see where her future leads her. She will make a significant impact on this world just the same as she has made one on my heart!
My wild child, my twin, my Little Sister! Presley is a ball of fire, just like her hair, packed full of so much personality. She has taught me to look at life in such a different way, to accept the things we cannot change, and to truly make time for the little things that really matter. She's the nurturing type, my little Momma in the making, and a lover of all things baby! I call her Mini because she is so tiny compared to Giulietta, yet her spirit and confidence make up where he stature may be lacking. She is the one I worry about the most, because my need for her to be close to me is so much deeper then anyone will ever know. And, as she continues to grow, I know my heart will break in beautiful bittersweet pieces as I slowly watch her walk her own path.
My number three, my something blue, my Boy! It certainly seems surreal that after nine months of having Baby Boy inside, I am a mere few days away from holding him in my arms and whispering his name out loud to him for the first time. Once again, our life as we know it will change. And, as much as I appear to be a pro at this Momma thing, I'm definitely a bit new and curious about the whole boy thing. From his physical body parts, to his supposed high energy level, to his "Momma's Boyness" I'm excited to be able to say I have a son, to see what my new role in life will bring, and snuggle my baby close to my chest as my salty tears of joy caress his soft skin. But, most of all I'm excited to see the bond he forms with his Daddy-O as the years pass.
Life is so precious, so delicate, so perfect in so many ways, and it can't be planned out when one is really living it to it's full potential. As my last few days of being pregnant unfold, I feel my baby boy's kicks the last few times inside of my torpedo shaped belly, and The Morad Four turns into the Morad Five I hope to be able to slow down time enough to truly be able to embrace this miracle of life that the Hubster and I have again created. And, now is the time that I dream!
I dream of the last push that leads to the moment the doctor places my naked Little Boy on my chest so I can count his 10 perfect fingers and 10 perfect toes. I dream about seeing the tears well in my sweet husbands eyes the first time he holds his Baby Boy. I dream of watching my 2 daughters walk into the hospital room to hold their new Baby Brother they've waited so long and so patiently for. I dream of taking our Baby Boy home from the hospital and into his new loving home. I dream of introducing our new bundle of joy to all our family, friends, and loved ones who have showed so much support to our family. I dream of mornings curled up on the couch with my three little loves next to me, and my one big one close by. And, I dream of a lifetime full of love, happy memories and a path well traveled OUR WAY!
**A special Thank You to Marci Phee for taking the time & love to capture these beautiful pictures of my growing family! We love you and appreciate all you love, support and kindness!!**